Monday, February 2, 2009

The Gender Factor

How many of the following do you think are true?

1.    A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the garbage, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail. A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.

2.   A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't. A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change and she does.

3.   Even the creator doesn’t understand a woman’s internal logic. A man has lots of data but he still remains clueless.

4.   The language a woman uses to communicate with other women is incomprehensible. A man is supposed to help you solve your problems, but half of the time he is the problem.

5.   For a five day vacation a woman needs whole wardrobe, but a man requires only a suitcase.

6.   A woman bothers to remember everyone’s birthdays and anniversary, no such great problem I see in man.

7.   Old friends gives women crap when they gain or loose weight, no such case in men.

8.    A woman hesitates to leave the hotel bed unmade, no such case in men.

9.   When your work is criticized, a woman panics that everyone secretly hates her, no such case in men.

1    A woman can hug her best friend without worrying she'll think she's gay. Guyz reminds me of dostana movie.

1        If a woman cheats on her partner everyone will assume it's because she was being emotionally neglected.  If a man cheats on  his partner, everyone thinks he got interested in someone younger.

12.               Women know exactly what buttons to push to get exactly what they want, Men only think they know.

13.               Women can get drunk quicker and cheaper than men.

14.               If a woman cries, she's sensitive; if a man cries, he's a wimp. 

15.               Women can be groupies. Male groupies are stalkers.

16.                It's cool to be a daddy's girl. It's sad to be a mummy's boy. 

17.               A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

18.               A man has five items in his bathroom: a toothbrush, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel from the Marriott. The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify most of these items.

19.               A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams. A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.

20.               Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed. Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

21.               Women love cats. Men say they love cats, but when women aren't looking, men kick cats.

22.               Men's magazines often feature pictures of naked ladies. Women's magazine also feature pictures of naked ladies. This is because the female body is a beautiful work of art, while the male body is hairy and lumpy and should not be seen by the light of day.

23.               Little girls love to play with toys. Then, when they reach the age of 11 or 12, they lose interest. Men never grow out of their obsession wih toys. As they older, their toys simply become more expensive and impractical. Examples of men's toys: little miniature TV's, car phones, complicated juicers and blenders, graphic equalizers, small robots that serve cocktails on command, video games, anything that blinks, beeps, and requires at least six "D" batteries to operate.

24.               When reminiscing about weddings, women talk about "the ceremony". Men talk about "the bachelor party".

25.               Men love to talk politics, but often they forget to do political things such as voting. Women are very happy that another generation of Kennedys is growing up and getting into politics, because they will be able to campaign for them and cry on election night.

26.               Men see the telephone as a communications tool. They use the telephone to send short messages to other people. A woman can visit her girlfriend for two weeks, and upon returning home, she will call the same friend and they will talk for three hours.

27.               A man will pay Rs.2000 for a Rs.1000 item he wants. A woman will pay Rs.1000 for a Rs.2000 that she doesn't want.